Friday, May 6, 2011

Change... Just not the kind I was expecting.....

Hey all! Hope you're having a wonderful Saturday!!

First of all, I have to talk briefly about my trip to NYC with my best college girlfriends. It was fantastic. I've never been to NYC before and expected to be a little intimidated since it's the biggest city in the U.S. and all, but when I got there, I felt quite comfortable. And after all the sight-seeing we did, I would even go so far as to say I loved it and would totally live there for a couple of years if I could go back in time and do it B.C. (before child). Of course, there's the fact that I would probably have to tie Greg up to get him there and sedate him so he would be unaware of his surroundings for a couple of years. Oh, and I'd also have to be rich because I would prefer to live in Greenwich Village and eat out nightly at the magnificent restaurants they have all over the city. Ummm, and I'd also have to make sure I had proper transportation because me no likey the subway. But other than that, I could TOTALLY live in New York. Did I mention I had a good time? :-) It's actually impossible NOT to have a good time with those girls. Love them. Here are a couple of pics taken at the top of the Empire State Building:

Erin and I....

Emilie and I....

Next topic......change. And this is going to get a little heavy, so be forewarned. If you're looking for a light-hearted, humorous post...you might want to skip this one. It seems like there are two kinds of people in this world: those who are averse to change and those who are addicted to it. I am in the camp of the latter. I love change. I get bored without it. After going through several moves as a result of Greg's job that has taken us literally from one coast to the other and a couple of states in between, I've grown to rely on change. When things become lackluster; when I start to get that uncomfortable itch to just pack up and run....change is there to take my hand and lead me to the next shiny, new destination where a fresh start awaits. Our moves have kept us in one location for only 2 to 3 years tops. Just long enough to start to get the itch. That is, until now. We've been in Lincoln, NE for just over 4 years now and I'm feeling it. Big time.

It's not that I don't love Lincoln because, surprisingly, I do. Greg and I both do. But that pesky "change bug" has gotten the best of me over the last year or so. And I've kind of allowed it to keep me from living life. You see, a few months after Ben joined our family, I started to build this "perfect world" in my mind where we would move back to Bloomington, IL......where many of our family and friends either reside or live within a 75 mile radius of. I envisioned get-togethers with family and friends, play-dates, driving down to my parents house in the middle of the week just to have lunch and chat, having many available baby-sitters ;-) And just when this perfect scenario seemed to be the only thing that would allow me to be "happy", Greg got an interview....in Bloomington. The timing was perfect. I thought, "this has God's hands all over it!". And I knew he would get the job. Except that he didn't. We were both disappointed, but hoped and prayed that another opportunity would present itself. In the meantime, I have been pouring over real estate sites and day-dreaming about the day we will move there and all the fun that will be had.

In recent days, however, I have become bombarded with messages about "living in the present". The message has come through the radio, on blogs I follow, in a daily devotional I read, on T.V. Seriously...it has become a little much. Only now do I finally realize I've been ignoring all the gifts God has given me and, instead, focusing all my time and energy on my idea of what life "should" be. Ignoring that I have our God-given family of three, this beautiful home we live in, this lovely community we are a part of, the fact that I GET to stay home and raise our son, this beautiful LIFE that God has blessed me with. I have stopped living life in the present and opted to resume living again when I get my perfect world scenario. Oh, yeah, I need change. Just not the kind I was hoping for. The change needs to happen in my heart...in my perspective. I am blessed with more than any one person should have. And it's time I started embracing it. Whew, it's nice to say that!

I decided to write about this because I think it's something we all do from time to time. We get it in our heads that we NEED a certain circumstance, or material object or what have you to be happy. And in doing this, we miss out on life. God-given life filled with precious moments we won't ever get back. Let's stop cheating ourselves. We were created to live an abundant life. To slow down and enjoy each moment as it happens. So let's do it!! Who's with me??

Hope you all have a great, fun-filled weekend! And don't worry....my next post will return to it's regularly-scheduled light-heartedness :-)

Brooke

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Wow! I just read this today (a little late). You are so very right!You most definitely are listening to the "still small voice". Isn't it liberating to know you're exactly where God wants you to be at the moment. It opens up all the exciting possibilities of how He's going to use you right where you're at :)Of course we'd love you to be back here but I'd much rather you be there and in God's will than here and not. Of course that can change when you're least expecting it :) Love you so much!